My TV stopped working. Strangely, the world didn’t stop turning.

I realised I was in trouble when I rang up the repair people and they put me through to a “special department” after I told them my TV didn’t have a plasma or LCD screen.

“You have a cathode ray tube set?” I was asked in the strange tone I hear when I tell people I don’t own a car.

“Yeah, I live in a tower block,” I told them. I’ve found that people accept, “I live in a tower block” as an explanation for just about anything.

the hole in my life where the tv isn't

They wanted the model number. It took me a while to find it under the accumulated dust. Then the number didn’t exist on their system. I worked out the TV was 20 years old. It had never previously needed repairing.

They don’t make ‘em like they used to.

No one locally knew how to service a CRT TV. They had to find a repair man in London. When the guy saw the set he laughed and I knew it was the end of the line for the TV.

The repair man took a look. The circuit board on which the transformer sits had carbonised with heat and age, become brittle and cracked.

No chance of replacement parts. Short of getting hold of the circuit diagrams and building a new board myself, that’s that for a faithful old friend.

Time for an upgrade.

I only replace things when I have no alternative. I’m the kind of guy people at Apple hate. When I do get something new, I get the biggest and best model I can with all the gadgets and gizmos. I then play with all the gadgets and gizmos once and never use them again.

It keeps me happy.

I’ve been drooling over the 42”, all singing, all dancing, high-definition ready, plasma screen TV’s. Then it occurred to me to get a tape and measure the hole the new TV would occupy.

A 42” TV is 1 meter wide. That would stretch from the arm of the sofa to the edge of the wall in the photo. It would over-dominate the room.

I would have to move the furniture and plants. The ivy wouldn’t like that. See it growing up the wall? And let’s be honest, I don’t watch that much TV.

I have settled for a 32” plasma screen, which is not quite state of the art when it comes to clarity etc, but it is “high definition ready” and will be a huge improvement on my old set.

It arrives Friday, which gives me a whole weekend to play with gadgets and gizmos.

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